This Is Me

      This is me. I'm sick.  I'm overweight.  I'm not strong.  When I look at this picture of me, taken by my 13 year old daughter, this evening, I feel shame.  I feel disgust.  I am angry at myself that I look this way.  That I let myself get this way.  Sure, I have reasons.  I have been sick a long time.  I have been overwhelmed.  But truth be told, I didn't fight.  I didn't try.  Life got me down in a million different ways, and when push came to shove, I let it.

      I let life get me down.  But I am starting to realize something.  I do not have to stay down.  I can stand up.  I can fight.  I can reach out and make a better future for myself, and set a better example for my kids.  I can be strong.  I may never be completely healthy, but I can be healthier.  This picture isn't permanent, it's a starting point.  This is my day  one.